San Diego 274

When you sign up for a public gym, you pretty much know what to expect – a mix of characters, from the occasional oddball to high school kids getting into fitness, and yes, even the stereotypical old guy strutting around in his birthday suit. It’s the way the cookie crumbles and I'm not one to judge. However, let me recount an incident that recently caught me off guard.

I had just finished work around 9 pm, and since the gym closes at 11, I expected the place to wind down. As I strolled in, it was noticeably quiet, which I attributed to the late hour. The plan was a quick swim followed by a 20-minute sauna session. The swim went smoothly, and feeling strong and lit up from blood pumping, I changed into some shorts and headed for the sauna.

Surprisingly, the gym was practically empty, and the locker room was eerily silent. As I opened the sauna door, I was met with a sight I wasn’t expecting – a familiar face from the gym, butt-ass naked, bending over and engaged in some questionable stretching. I unintentionally got an eyeful of a build that I had never signed up for, including an intimate view of his backside AKA his brow starfish AKA his butthole.

Now, I'm no prude, and I've been in saunas where nudity is the norm, but let's be clear – public gyms in the USA aren't one of those places. Nobody, and I mean nobody, needs an impromptu anatomy lesson, especially in such close quarters. The guy realized the error of his ways and profusely apologized. I played it cool and assured him it was fine; I'm not one to make a scene.

Nevertheless, a gym has unspoken rules, and this incident certainly crossed a certain line to me it wasn’t a huge deal but to some others, I guarantee it could’ve gone differently. Saunas are meant for relaxation, not unexpected and up-close encounters with the human form. I get it – we're all comfortable with our bodies, but there's a time and place for everything. So, a piece of friendly advice: save the naked yoga stretches for home, or go into the woods and be a little naked elf out there. It's not a big deal, really, but let's respect the unspoken etiquette of the gym.