Washington 62
This is back. It’s been some time since I’ve been on this and I have reasons for taking a long break which was needed for my sanity.
I would like to start by saying that the past 6 months or whatever timeline it is, has been life-changing and unforgettable to the places I’ve been to the people I’ve met its been a wild ride which is still not over. Ive learned so much about who I am and how I see the environment around me. Ive become patient and understanding of peoples opionions about me. I dont have a feeling of anger or indignation which makes me feel free. We care so much about ourselves and love who we are more than anything but we value the opinions of others so highly. Im not here to be a philospher or sound like some wise guru, I am writing about thoughts ive had spending hours alone with no service no device to distract me from the only thing i cannot escape my mind. I am no pure being to be honest I am far from it… I am flawed in so many aspects that I wouldnt know where to start. I can only try and get better as a human being improve myself as a lover, son or whatever comes my way.
The transition from Utah to Washington has been okay to say the least, its been a lot rougher on my mental state than anything. I think its very healthy for individuals to spend large amounts of time alone to be able to reflect on mistakes and personal decisions but I believe there is a fine line between to much of that time. You end up spending to much time alone and you go a little crazy, you’re mind is the master and you are just the prisoner of it. We as human beings need that human companionship we crave that social interaction its in our nature but on the other end of the spectrum, we should learn to be on our own enjoy our own company and be happy with our own presence its all about balance just like all things. I recently have been reading a philosopher Jiddu Krishnamurti and I read a quote from him that goes If you begin to understand what you are without trying to change it, then what you are undergoes a transformation. It spoke volumes to so many factors in my life and probably many other people, i’ve spent a lot of time trying to understand who I am my purpose in life, love and happiness. I would like to eventually venture into sexuality and my experiences with sex, women and overall love in and itself.
I have no idea what this will become or what I want it to become this is it for now a piece of my thoughts in fluid writing. Allowing whoever comes across this to sense a piece of vulnerablity I have through a screen and give me a chance to share stories and lessons ive had throughout my time being autonomous and living purely for myself.